You Nique By Design

 

“There are those who discover they can leave behind destructive reactions and become patient as the earth, unmoved by fires of anger or fear, unshaken as a pillar, unperturbed as a clear and quiet pool.”

~ The Dhammapada

‘Feelings are much like waves, we can’t stop them from coming but we can choose which one to surf.’

~ Jonatan Martensson

 ’Emotions are are like crayons, a thermometer, indicators of how we are feeling in an experience, emotions are what add the display of colors to our inlying feelings.’ ~ Julia Lisa

“A man who is master of himself can end a sorrow as easily as he can invent a pleasure. I don’t want to be at the mercy of my emotions. I want to use them, to enjoy them, and to dominate them.’

~ Oscar Wilde

‘This too shall pass.’ — Advisors to King Solomon

 

A benefit of growing up and maturing more into the second half of my life experience is by the daily practicing throughout the years of being aware of how I was feeling and the way I expressed my feelings through my emotions up to this point in my life. I’ve changed my mind about a lot of things and how I perceive them from how I once did.

Emotions can encompass a wide range of feelings and sensations, anywhere from peaceful and mild to strongly overpowering and at times debilitating. Have you ever felt the effects of being on an emotional roller coaster ride which seem to come upon you when circumstances appeared to be beyond your control leaving you exhausted and bewildered in its aftermath?

Are you able to remain steadily calm, strong hearted, balanced on an even keel in the Center of Peaceful Silence during the storms and upheavals that come our way in life?

Do you remember ever being asked to draw a line down the center of a page and to separate out under the two given labels on each side the good and/or bad feelings or pro’s and con’s and so on? Have you ever asked yourself, are these the only two types of emotions or definitions of how one is feeling?  Is there possibly a balance, also known as a happy medium an in between? What are emotions for, why do we have them and what do we do with them when we are experiencing the ones that do not feel as wonderful as the ones that emote from feeling uncomfortable or painful?

A wise friend once shared with me about getting too emotionally caught up ( leaning off balance) especially in the area of relationships,

‘Don’t get too high on the highs and don’t get too low on the lows. Stay in middle, (the center) and just go with it, the ups and downs, just ride them like a wave.’ 

— Rick Irons (Surf Pro)

Excellent advice. While this thought has always stayed with me, I’ve been reminded of this wise advice by having an inflow of experiences that have allowed me to understand this more by practicing on staying more centered through ever evolving cycles of self growth. My friend wasn’t saying to not have any emotions, just not to allow myself to be ruled by them by getting stuck in them or wash over by them.

In the Center of stillness, you Master the Flow. Through the daily practice of bringing myself back into consciously keeping myself mindful, it gets easier to remain in a calm state, and doing this in awareness is what allows me to ride the Rhythm of Life’s Energy in Flow and not experience so many bumps and bruises.

Sounds wonderful doesn’t it? I just wasn’t there at that stage in my life. I was in my early twenties, and definitely ruled by getting ridden by my emotions. I wasn’t aware enough to know how to manage them, they just ’seemed’ to happen at a moment’s notice. It is a time in life when most of us are much more concerned with fitting in and being accepted by others, trying to please others, being too unsure of oneself and intimidated to rock the boat by being one’s Authentic Self.

I eventually realized it was because I didn’t really know who my Authentic Self was at the time. I was not aware of Being in here. This doesn’t always appear to one as being one’s conscious choosing coming through one’s subconscious programming.

Until I became aware that my emotional reactions were being based on an underlying conditioned programming response, I would be given another repeat lesson (opportunity) to learn how to balance my emotions and be free from being tossed to and fro in an overwhelming sea of emotions through first deprogramming and then reprogramming my patterned ways of thinking. An ongoing experience in Self Mastery. I’ve become more mindful of the value of re-tracing the repeated emotional reactionary or response patterns back to where they originated from by staying vigilant in following its trail. The ones that are subconsciously absorbed and ingrained by the emotional triggers patterned into ones subconscious through one’s daily environmental upbringing, and until I could understand this I would continue to reinforce them even more by repeating them.

‘All the knowledge I possess everyone else can acquire, but my heart is all my own.’

~ Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe

This is an ongoing work in progress that can only be done within each of ourselves. It took awhile until I began to realize that I’m the only one who can allow by my own choosing to manage the emotional reactions or responses I am having within myself and no one else can own that for me.

No one else can embody me by feeling my Inner feelings. No one can make me feel any way unless I give my power to them to do so.

Whenever you have been going through a ‘trying’ and emotional circumstance, while another may be able to empathize with your feelings, they cannot have their feelings for you nor you them. You can sense what they are feeling by reading the energy of their feelings behind or underneath their outward expressing emotions.

Empathizing without Embodying another’s emotions.

I’ve shared about cycles in Nature. This has been very helpful for me in understanding how to ride the waves or rhythms of my life and handle my emotions more effectively. Through growing in my understanding by observing seasons, I can see that each cycle comes round again. Another opportunity to gain higher ground in evolving in my Spiritual growth as I let go of the former seasons growth. Not trying to go out of sync by resisting them and clinging onto to them but by allowing them to take their natural course by cycling on through. Synchronizing with the cycles.

In light of all the discussions on positive and negative emotions, I’ve noticed the tendency to label a positive as ‘good’ and a negative as ‘bad’. Remove the labels and they are what they are. Emotions. Like red is red and blue is blue. They are colors. Emotions are indicators of where one is positionally from a Centered Calm. Emotions are neither good nor bad, how we act upon them is up to us. I find that when I label something I tend to resist it more by not letting it go through its full cycle and just being with it. I give it a limitation. This and no further. It’s when its been allowed its full expression in me that it can play itself out by allowing it to flow on through, not suppressing or resisting it.

It’s over, it’s finished. It’s run its course. Next ~

I have spent a lot of energy working on having feel ‘good’ emotions all the time, especially if I am experiencing feeling ‘not so good’ emotions however, I noticed it would work only for awhile. Then something would come up and here I was swinging like an emotional pendulum once again, sometimes feeling it stronger than before. These emotions kept coming back because instead of just letting the emotion rise up and go, I kept working by suppressing the ‘not so good’ ones or trying to cover or change it with a peanut butter smear of get to the ‘feel good’ thoughts. Why? Because I didn’t like the way I was feeling and I wanted to feel another way, treating the symptoms and not getting to the cause or source of the emotion. Get rid of the feeling idea. I wanted to get away from it because I kept focusing on wanting to change it from pain, instead of finding the source of the pain and this only gives it more  power to control me by returning until it is allowed to show me where the wound is.

I kept running away from ‘feeling bad’ or negative emotion. When I was ‘feeling good’ I didn’t want it to end. This is also a sign of a lack mentality. ‘I won’t ever feel this happy again mentality.’ I looked at negative as a bad thing to be avoided and positive as a good thing to run towards and cling to. This is due to a conditioned, programmed labeling of emotional reactions or responses and can be from not being allowed to experience one’s emotions freely, to be dis-allowed to feel what one feels in the moment. It’s called disowning ones feelings.

We all grow up by observing and subconsciously absorbing what is in our immediate environment whether our home and/or societal influences and we notice that certain things are viewed as a standard of good or bad with a reward system. Anger, depression, hurt, pain, sadness and grief are labeled as negative, bad or darker emotions and not allowed. Happiness, joy, elation, upbeat is labeled as good, positive or lighter emotions and are allowed. They are contrasts. How do we define joy if we have not experienced pain or sadness? They are indicators of where we are from our Center. That’s all they are. Once we begin to master our emotions, which one would we chose to emote the most authentically, would we chose one over the other or would we chose to balance in the center more in choosing to return into a peaceful state.

Emotions are indicators of how I am measuring in degrees, coloring in depth, an experience I am having. How am I perceiving what is happening and how am I defining what is happening to me. How do I get back into and remain in the Center? Your experience is continually showing you how.

By Inviting the Divine, we connect with our Higher Self, the Divine Spirit within us to show us how. We become more consciously aware of what our Higher Self is showing us by focusing more on paying attention to Its responses . Spirit’s respons to my asking is usually given by an opportunity that shows up to re-learn, to find the balance by practicing in the present moment situation, in becoming aware of seeing the differences clearer than before that lead me back to a balanced Center. My lessons tend to repeat themselves until I am able to receive what I have asked for. Until I get it. I Ask, ‘What is this emotion showing me, what is it based on, What is the source of this emotion, the trigger? ‘

I also ask for another way to see the situation, person or thing through the eyes of truth and not judgment. Through the eyes of Spirit and not by a physical face value.

I stumbled over emotions a lot especially in my earlier formative years and still do trip up at times. Only now, I am much more mindful of my emotional cycles through remaining disciplined in the practice of being mindfully present with them as they arise and throughout this process I have grown in my understanding to allow them be what they are while acknowledging them, and not making such a big deal out of them, or trying to change them by fixing them or struggling with pushing them back down. It saps my energy more when I wrestle with them or suppress them. Emotions can evolve into being a wise tool and guidance system when we manage them and not the other way around. We have the power to choose the colors of our life experiences by our thoughtful choosing and not by being run over and jumped by our emotions. We have the innate ability to be the skilled Master in how we use our emotions. When we do we realize that we are the Artist of our Life picture.

Energy flows naturally. Go with it. Don’t be afraid of your feelings by resisting them or letting them have their way with you. With applying conscious daily practice you will Master your emotions.

Having our emotions is very much a part of our Spiritual Life experience here. Our emotions are a thermometer or indicator of where we are at in feeling Love or moving away from Love. I believe it has to do with loving and accepting our Authentic Essential Self and being okay with who we are and where we are in this moment. Genuinely appreciating ourself the way we are without outer influences. We spend so much of our earlier years stuffing and hiding our genuine feelings down for fear of being rejected and not being loved for having these feelings. We don’t seem to know what to do with our feelings. We then have these emotional roller coaster rides when we deny the feelings of our Authentic Essential Self and aren’t at peace within ourselves and while we are with others. “If they only knew what I was feeling they would get angry, reject me, not love me or accept me.” And then this shows up in our emotions. And our emotions emulate backwards what we are truly feeling inside. Have you ever thought or said, ‘Why did I do or say that? That is not what I meant?’

Sure you have, we all have.

Are you open to consider that we are not our emotions? I see our emotion as tools given to us to be able to connect on this physical level as an extension of what we are in Spirit. Connected. A way of communicating outwardly what is being communicated from within.

Unconscious (subconscious) beliefs lurking in the depths are just thoughts that have been allowed to run on autopilot. Allow them to surface into the Light to be examined and then release them in gratitude. Your Authentic Self InJoys having room or the free flow of freedom to fill IT Self with fresh air, new thoughts. The old thoughts have been allowed to surface, they are ready to go having served their purpose. Let them pass on. It’s like putting little notes in a bottle and sending them out to sea.

I am much more comfortable within myself now and allow myself to just be. I am with my sadness or down moments when they pass through and ask the questions if necessary. I go about my day much more in mindfulness and I stay in listening mode. Ideas show up as I remain willing to accept and be where I am in the moment. I find that when I remain in silence, consciously stilling the chattering mind, I am in a relaxed and Peaceful state, aware of my Inner Self’s presence. I am not as easily swayed by being overcome with my emotions as much and I am finding this in the Silent Center as I continue to practice this way of Being. I am learning to love myself no matter what, happy, sad, joyful, mad and peaceful and anything else that flows my way. I am a fluid being, not a stagnant one. In being more conscious, in staying steadier in the practicing of this for many years, I notice that it has been bringing me into a deeper understanding of what it means to Lovingly accept myself the way I am. And I am able to be more loving and accepting with others as well.

Being in the Center doesn’t mean you turn into a robot. As a wise friend shared with me, ‘We are not robots.’ We can be our Authentic Selves in our relationships with others when we remain mindfully present in our current place of being and allow ourselves to express without our emotions spewing out all over the place due to re-occuring suppression of our feelings building up over time. You will begin to notice that you are able to emote anger or hurt, and that it can be said in Loves peacefulness because it is being addressed as it comes up. It is being kept a small issue not a huge one. that has been stewing for years and never handled. There is more balance in the energy behind your emotions when you keep short accounts.

Heart truth can be spoken in a calm state while getting your feelings across. It’s okay to say to another, I am angry or hurt by your statement or actions without tearing them from limb to limb in an out of control emotional state. I felt misunderstood when you said this. That is not disrespecting another’s feelings nor yours. This will change the way you relate with others because you are not holding past emotions under, ready to explode when one pushes the left unaddressed emotional button. The button will have already been diffused by releasing the source of the emotion if you have allowed Divine Spirit to show you how and where it originated from and set it free by allowing it to be released and felt. You allow yourself to feel and the emotions follow.

I’ve given my share of crying on friends shoulders and received theirs. In these moments we can put our arms around one another and just be with one another. It is okay to have days when we feel weak and need a friend to hold our hand while all we can do is cry. Our day comes to be strong for another when they are going through their own emotional cycles.

This is life sharing life with another.

Nature shows us this through the cycle of seasons. We can trust in the process which is always moving us forward. It grows us into deeper, richer, Spiritually evolving Beings. The sun rises but it also sets in our world as we see it. And it comes round again every new day. We do not have to fear that it won’t when we take our eyes off the edge and look beyond into the horizon and realizing that the sun does not move in its position, its always there.

Steady and Unchanging no matter what is happening in our Universe, our world.

Its radiance shines upon All. Like the Love that encompasses All if we are willing to look beyond what we think we see in this moment and into the unknown space of what we have yet to know and feel its Presence.

Emotions are Divinely given and serve a wonderful purpose in our life experiences. It connects us with one another. We all share the same emotions just at different times.

I encourage you to Ask to be shown where you may have emotional wounds that need to be fully allowed feeling and in doing so, they are free to be released into the healing Light of Loves Presence that is always here and ready to shine ITs Presence into our wounded shadows, our fears.

I encourage you to Ask to receive your Emotional Healing and to be freed to flow by being able to express your Authentic Self in the ride of balancing?and mastering your emotions. Being fully Present with them and knowing that you are Loved no matter how you may be feeling in this moment.

This too shall pass ~

Many Blessings, Be Well

InJoy Being in the flow, riding the rhythmic waves with your Wonderful Authentic Self,

All is Always Well,

The Sun always rises ~

Julia