‘For it is a false assertion that the sense of man is the measure of things…because the individual man…refracts and discolors the light of nature.’

~ Francis Bacon

“Our lives shouldn’t be based on what can’t be doubted, but on what we have the best reasons to believe. All other ways lead to insanity.”

~ J. Budziszewski

I wrote about what follows in the forums where I participate, regarding discussions that relate to spiritual topics and to consider whether we tend to use our objective or subjective reasoning abilities when discussing matters of a spiritual nature. Are we able to use our objective (unbiased) reasoning to come to the truth in spiritual matters? Or does the use of our subjective (personal)  reasoning seem to keep us from ever being able to come to the truth of the matter? Is there a way to find The Way for our souls eternal resting place?

What is Your Reasoning Style?

Have you ever evaluated your reasoning style? Is it more objective or subjective? Come and see, take a look with me, as I have come to clearly see the way mine has most prominently been for many years, and now, I am uncovering my ability to use both ways in making different decisions in my life.

We are being overwhelmed daily with so much information grabbing for our attention, and we have the ablility within our self to take the responsibility to create order from within all this informational chaos of our modern day. Our ability to make use of our objective reasoning, helps us to define what the repeatable patterns outside and apart from our self are, assisting us in being able to sort through it all and understand what is true, from what could possibly be true, to being able to identify what is absolutely untrue or false.

We have to have a firm grasp on what defines objective and subjective reasoning, especially in these days when so many are buying into the idea that ‘truth is subjective or relative’ as we diversely subjugate truth with the cliche of  ’my truth and your truth’ which has led many people to accepting the idea that truth is an illusion. A sign of our times…and one that does not lead us in the direction of agreement, it leads instead to seven billion disagreements.

Is there level ground to be found? A reason to agree and not disagree?

An objective reason is completely unbiased, because it is untouched by any of our previous personal experiences, tastes, or preferences. It is outside the sphere of our personal experience, yet this does not mean it does not exist. An objective reason is also verifiable by concrete facts, including three or more agreed witnesses, and/or figures that support the person’s statement. Whether we exist or not, an objective reason still exists, as it is independent of whether we believe it is true or not, so it is not dependent upon our view point in order to exist.

A subjective reason on the other hand, has been colored over by the lens of our uniquely individual character based upon being the person who is doing the speaking or writing, and often has a basis in reality but reflects our personal perspective of how we view reality. Our reality can hide over reality as I was saying above.

Subjective reason is a view point that cannot be verified by using concrete facts and figures to support our statement, although sometimes there may be a witness that agrees with a particular statement we make. It is colored by our own  previous personal experiences, tastes and preferences and ceases to exist when we do.

What Is the Purpose for Using Our Objective and Subjective Reasoning?

 They are both tools that affects the way we make the decisions in our life, and each way of reasoning serves their purpose in our decision making process quite differently. To make a solidly wise choice, it is essential to use the appropriate method of reasoning to be able to make a wise, solid, or good choice about something that may be at high risk, like relating to our physical health and well-being, and as above so below, relates to decisions we make that pertains to our spiritual well-being as well.

Objective reasoning is important to use when making any kind of a rational decision like with making the choice in buying a house or a car, or whether to make a change in our careers or not, basically when something will come with a high cost if something is overlooked and there is an error. Objective reasoning is the better choice when making a high risk decision because of how the decision will have an impact upon our life and possibly impact those around us. We are looking both ways before crossing the street. Weighing carefully our options because the quality of our life depends on it.

Subjective reasoning is useful when nothing of real importance is at stake in our decision making process. Like what flavor of tea we will be drinking at a restaurant or choosing our meal. It’s based purely on what appeals to us as an individual based upon our own personal preferences and not necessarily fact based, and using our subjective reasoning has nothing to do with others choices, unless of course we allow others subjective reasoning to sway our own. It’s used when a decision in our life is not a life threatening or life changing decision.

When we hold our subjective view as  being the basis for everyone else’s view of  life, we are projecting our view onto all others in our life, making our view true for all others, by believing what is true for me is equally true for everyone else, even when there is nothing to substantiate this as being true or not, it’s not concrete, it’s subjective.  We tend to say this is being objective when we are in reality, truthfully being subjective.

This is why it is important to define the difference and purpose between the two kinds of reasoning. Which one is honestly your most particular point of view of life reasoning style and how will it determine the outcome of your decision? Is it possible that we might be wrong about our point of view? Can we be objective with our self and others, in order to understand why another believes what they do, or we do for that matter? The disagreements we have are opportunities to validate or invalidate our opinions or that of another, for making a wise choice, not to prove someone wrong. We might be the one who is wrong.

Objective reasoning is very beneficial when having discussions with others especially new acquaintances, in order to keep our focus on the goal or the discussion on topic, and not by what is coloring our reasoning with what appeals to us, thus triggering an emotionally based response that can turn a discussion into an argument. Our subjective reasoning, is laden with our emotions and when having a discussion, especially in regards to a topic with a difficult nature, it calls for being based upon making a rational decision and not an irrational one.

I say this only because I recognize this in myself. And what is ironic, is that I was tested as being a highly logical person! And I have allowed my subjective reasoning to over rule this fact many times in my life! So for years, I kept ignoring my logical side and ran with my subjective side full stream. What I understand much more clearly now about myself, is that I can make good use of both, it’s just knowing when it’s the proper time to use them and which one to use. The right tool for the right ‘job’.

It doesn’t mean there are no facts in subjective reasoning, it’s just more difficult to define what they are, because they are all in our own minds and based upon our own past experiences, and our own emotions are a factor when sharing from our own subjective point of view or perspective. And no one else can feel or think the same way as we do.

 ’Objective reason deals with universal truths that dictate that an action is either right or wrong…Under subjective reason, concepts lose their meaning. All concepts must be strictly functional to be reasonable.’

~ Max Horkheimer

Our objective reasoning allows us to use facts that are concrete and tangible to find level ground, and the way to reach agreement. It is unbiased when what we are pointing to can also be validated by others outside of our own minds view point. As in 2+2=4. It’s the same equation whether we are an American, Canadian, Japanese, English, African or are flying in an air plane or sailing a boat. It’s based upon our objective reasoning.

Are You Objective or Subjective When Discussing Spiritual Matters?

When speaking of all kinds of things of a spiritual nature. It’s interesting that whenever anything is mentioned about Jesus and/or God, we tend to leave objective reasoning out and instead out comes our subjective reasoning! Well…in speaking of spiritual topics, we can no more leave Jesus or God out of the spiritual topic equation any more than we can leave evolution or creationism out of scientific topics. To do so leaves very large gaps in the information being presented as incomplete.

In order for all to observe and be able to make a rational objective decision, the discussion interestingly seems to switch from being objective to easily being from our subjective reasoning, whenever it comes to speaking of Jesus or God especially, and what they have to say about any topic that relates to us. We lose our objective reasoning abilities within having any discussion about Jesus or God in moments it seems…

Interesting…

Something about bringing these two into a discussion seems to bring out the strongest emotional responses in us… It seems that as irritating as these two are to many, they are not easy to ignore.

In making a decision regarding the destination of our souls it would seem to be objective reasoning is the most reasonable choice, and our decision once objectively made, can be experienced subjectively as well. As an example, I will use the Biblical idea that mankind is made in the image and likeness of God. This is an objective statement. It applies to all mankind, both men and women, all races and cultures, and exists independent of our own personal opinion.  What we may think about this subjectively, doesn’t change the unbiased statement. It doesn’t change because it continues to exist outside of our personal opinion, whether we believe this or not,  won’t change the fact of this being a true statement. Is it possible that this idea may possibly be true outside of our personal opinion, as to whether we believe it does or not?

How each one of us chooses to perceive this statement as being true to us,  is evidenced by the way we choose to live based upon whether or not we apply this statement in how we relate with all people.

Are we objective (unbiased) or subjective (personal tastes and preferences) in how we treat other people?

As equals or only people I like are treated as equals and the rest well…

The decisions we make regarding the destination of our souls is no different than making a rational decision about our health as being vital to our well-being, since our choices will affect our ability to experience a certain quality of life, or can lead us down the road to our death.

Making a rational decision about the destination of our souls is necessary because we are speaking here of where our souls are going to be spending its eternity, and considering the scope of eternity as being outside of the sphere of time, it may be the most important decision we ever make for ourselves, for this life seems like a vapor when we consider what it can mean by an eternity. It’s possible to choose wisely. It is possible to create order within all this chaos of information bombarding us daily, by finding the patterns that will be helpful for us to understand what is true, what could possibly be true, and what is outrightly false or untrue.

Objective Questions To Ask About Any Spiritual Leader or Guides Entrusted With Our Souls Destination 

How can we do this objectively? Objective statements (unbiased) can be asked of anyone who claims to be a Spiritual leader or guide, whose claims will also be verified by outside of them-self third parties. Subjective statements may not always be true as they are colored by the personal opinion (biased) of the person making the statement them self.

These objective questions can be asked by anyone when looking to validate making a choice of who to be able to entrust with the final destination of our soul for all of eternity. The validity of a person’s statement is considered reliable and true when able to be agreed upon by three or more witnesses usually by those who have had some intimate or personal relationship with a person, in person, and also can include outside (of the relationship) witnesses.

Having had an unexpected encounter with Jesus Christ last year that has changed my life, I will use Him as my example here of testing His ability to be entrusted with my soul’s eternal destination by asking some objective questions about Him.

Is He willing to hold himself personally accountable by His own statement, of being responsible to keep His Word to me at all times?

Is He willing to show Himself faithful to maintain his responsibility in the keeping of my souls well being?

Is He involved in caring for my souls safety to make sure my soul reaches His specifically promised eternal destination as being the best place for my soul to find its find rest?

What insurance does He give me that my soul will indeed reach Heaven as being the place He defines is my souls’ resting place if I entrust my soul to His keeping ?

What do those who have known Him personally have to say about Him from seeing him at all different times and in all kinds of circumstances?

Does he have any double standards or any contradictions in himself or his life?

What’s it like to live with Him on a daily basis?

Does His words align with his behavior and actions all of the time, some of the time or not really?

How does He handle those who disagree with Him?

Where is He receiving His direction from regarding being able to qualify Himself as the way for all of mankind to reach their eternal destination?

What stands out about Him that would give evidence to validate that he is who he says he is?

Is there anything that separates him from all the rest who claim to also be the way?

What assurance if any does He give and how is he willing to back it up in action that shows that I can trust Him explicitly with the eternal destination, the final place of rest for my soul?

Is there any evidence in being able to validate the claims He makes as being 100% verifiable true?

Are there at least three or more witnesses that can validate that His claims are true?

Can He give me a 100% guarantee of knowing that His directional guidance is without a doubt the most accurate one?

Is He familiar with the place He is leading me to? Has He ever been there personally?

Does my subjective reasoning conflict with my objective reasoning regarding Him? Or do they both agree about this person? Which reason disagrees if there is conflict?

Have I genuinely looked into what He has to say for myself, or is my opinion of him formed by what others around me have said based upon their own subjective opinions about Him?

What are the consequences (if any) of not following his guidance?

If there are any consequences, do they agree with or contrast with other ways and possibilities of my soul being able to reach my eternal destination?

What do other ways say about there being any consequences (if any) in not following their way to reach my soul’s eternal destination?

If His way is not the one true way yet, I follow it, what are the consequences (if any) of my soul’s eternal destiny by living my life in following his way, if His way is the wrong way?

If other ways are not the one true way yet I follow them, what are the consequences (if any) of my souls eternal destiny in following after these other ways, if they are the wrong way?

Is It Possible God May Exist Out Side Our Subjective Reality?

Can we be objective about these questions asked? Yes, I genuinely believe we are capable of being unbiased yet are we willing to be unbiased? Can we reason and decide without involving our emotions in answering these questions? If emotions arise then we are using our subjective reasoning in answering objective questions that relate to the eternal destination of our soul. This doesn’t make us bad, just unable to be objective when it comes to our questions about God. Each and everyone of us tends to get emotional when we are speaking of God. Whether we agree or disagree.

And this tells me something. That God is personal. Because we take God personally as all of us do. It is literally impossible not to be affected in someway in speaking of things that relate with there being a God, or even Jesus for that matter.

God hasn’t gone away. Even atheists really believe in God deep down inside when you think about it, even if they never admit this until their death. Because they fight so hard against there being a God (not always outwardly) and anything having to do with God and they challenge those who believe in a God as much as they are challenged by people who believe in God. Why so much effort spent upon something or Someone Who does not exist? Why not focus on putting their efforts into something else that they say they do believe in? I am genuinely asking about this. And to say to stop the nonsense, is nonsense.

Can We Be Objective About God, Our Self and Others?

Love is not possible without forgiveness. And forgiveness begins with accepting it for our self. And we have to know ourself in an unbiased-objective way in order to be able to forgive our self and others, and this means we are very capable of harboring unforgiveness towards ourself and others, but ultimately it is towards God, even when hidden by denial. And we have to have a basis for knowing our self objectively from outside of our own personal bias.

Being unbiased about our self comes from someone objectively stating what they see in us without subjecting their personal emotions into their objective, by being ‘outside’ of ourself. While we have the ability to reason objectively, it seems we are not very good with applying this kind of reasoning with our self and others. We tend to favor our subjective reasoning when it comes to our self and others.

We speak of having a Love that is unconditional to draw out from within our self, yet we deny the very Source that gives it. Unconditional love isn’t a love based upon emotion, because emotions come from subjective reasoning. It’s a Love by Will, Freewill. It is Love choosing to Love by doing what is best for the object(ive) of God’s love and not based upon emotions or any other conditions, nor expectations of receiving anything in return, and this is simply not possible without being able to be objective of our self and with others. Otherwise our feelings get hurt when we feel like we are not being responded to and we take it personally, it has become subjective.

Something to Consider Objectively and Experience Subjectively 

What we also seem to forget about is that Love is not the only truth about God’s nature. It is written that God is also Holy and Just in His nature. And one part of God can’t deny the other or God cannot claim to be a Perfect Complete Being, a Fully Whole Being. This would describing a partial being.

It is not possible to know ourself objectively because we base our whole view of our life subjectively from within our self, tucked within the immaterial part of our self, where no one else like us can see. So to answer these questions I posted above, it would seem to be a logical choice to consider, that we are not just of a physical makeup that can be seen in body only, with some able to be hidden deep inside emotions tossed in for good measure.

It is a good possibility that we might just be triune in nature. Body, (heart)Soul(mind), spirit. It is written that we are made in the likeness of God. Making it also a possibility that God is very possibly a Triune Being in essence.

 And what I have been learning about what God has to say about us in reading the Bible again after a 16 year sabbatical, is that Jesus validated being Love’s Logic by being willing to Incarnate on earth as the Expressed Image of God in a body. Objectively view Him by the way He lived His life as was shared by three or more witnesses, actually quite a lot more but who is keeping count past three, four plus… He spoke with authority being the physical embodiment of The Logos, The Living Word of God,  and came to establish the way God’s view is of us in speaking to us of this truth and reality:

That we are made in the image of God, and are endowed with such infinite worth and value, revealed by the mystery of all time, in that God ’squished’ His Infinite Self into the limitations of a human body, in order to have a relationship with us, due to the infinite worth and value He holds of us, in giving us freewill to make moral choices.

 The Missing Link 

The ability to love and reason with one another comes from healing our relationship with God first, in order to be perfect or complete, fully furnished, whole as a being. And God’s Word is known as The Logos (Reason) or Word of God, Who is Jesus, who is The Lover of our souls. You can witness it for yourself in reading the Bible in the Book of John.

As I observe these ideas of practicing deep breathing, yoga, meditation, explaining right brain-left brain, etc…I see that these are other ways we are willing to explore as a spiritual healing practice, or we are seeking to understand and explore the spiritual side of our nature, yet these ways all turn our attention to being inside and subjectively focused, as being ways of looking specifically for God who exists outside of our reality in order to be able to remain unbiased in His unconditional love for each one of us.

We have possibly been looking for God in all the wrong places.

I notice how these practices are being used as ways that are considered helpful to the relieving of stress or releasing of unforgiveness, in order to give us more compassion and love, and I am struck by the clarity of seeing mankind’s need to have spiritual fulfillment and nurturing, to be fed spiritually in some way. It is an intimate necessity in us to have this spiritual hunger met and filled. I’m not saying these things will not help people. They just don’t deal with the root cause of what is causing the need  in us to look for other ways to practice spirituality when we are leaving God out of our equation.

A part of our triune nature is missing and we know this deep down inside.

This makes the third need we all have, as remaining incomplete-not fully filled in us, aside from meeting our body’s needs, our soul’s needs for being able to nurture our desire to feel and use our minds to reason or not, we also need a spiritual filling for our insatiable hunger that nothing else seems to fill. We have an innate need for God that only He can fill, while we continue to seek and live as though He is not real or accessible.

…the ways of God are way past finding out, and who can know Him intimately?

Long yes, but totally at peace in the writing of this, mm hmm, it is subjective from using experiences from my own life journey from being on this long road of looking everywhere else to find the right way to fill my spiritual hunger and I have finally found Him. I am fed by a Living God through relationship with Him.

May this speak to the soul who is still spiritually hungering and really looking for a way to logically and objectively be able to find the right direction for your soul’s resting place and then be able to finally find this rest, relax and enjoy the ride with a peaceful assurance, for you will know you are on your way and heading in the right direction that is leading you to Heaven, the final resting place for your soul for all eternity, because you know the One who has gone ahead before you, to prepare a place for you to live with Him.

This is the way Jesus spoke of Himself as being The Way. His Way.

And there were witnesses who validated what He said, after not believing it themselves at first.

You can find your way to The Way. I know you can. By using Love’s Logic in working together, and not by leaving one out and leaning only to one side. This leads to being imbalanced. It has taken me many year’s to understand this. Thank God for the gift of both when they work together, we gain deeper understanding on how to use the tools in the right way and much more effectively.

My life when I consider eternity, is just beginning and wow, my mother was prophetic again, in saying, ‘Lisa, in Japan, people believe and say, that life begins at 50′. Hon to Yo! Kahsan! It really does and I am a witness to this statement and loving it.  Thank you mom, I love you in my memory always.

In the Love of Christ for you all,

Sharing many blessings for your well being in finding your souls eternal resting place.

InJoy this day being open to looking at Love’s Logic objectively by considering His Way as The Way to Heaven,

 “We love him because he first loved us.” ~ 1 John 4:19

Love, Grace and Peace in the Spirit of Christ,

Julia

Photos by Michael Kloran & Imagehousing.com

Copyright © 2008 - 2012 You-Nique-By-Design.com

Blessed is The season which engages the whole world in a Conspiracy of love.

 ~ Hamilton Wright Mabie

 PEACE IS . . .

 ~ gazing at the stars with the knowledge that you know their Creator.

 ~ closing your eyes in sleep without fear of tomorrow.

 ~ the stillness in your heart when trouble swirls around you.

 ~ a quiet mind in a raging world.

 ~ Unknown

 ’Best of all, Christmas means a spirit of love, a time when the love of God and love of our fellow men should prevail over all hatred and bitterness, a time when our thoughts and deeds and the spirit of our lives manifest the presence of God.’

 ~ George F. McDougall

 ’The Son of God became a man to enable men to become the sons of God.’

 ~ C.S.Lewis (Mere Christianity)

 ’The giving of gifts is not something man invented. God started the giving spree when he gave a gift beyond words, the unspeakable gift of His Son.’

-~ Robert Flatt

 ’This is Christmas: not the tinsel, not the giving and receiving, not even the carols, but the humble heart that receives anew the wondrous gift, the Christ.’

 -~ Frank McKibben

God grant you the light in Christmas, which is faith;

the warmth of Christmas, which is love;

the radiance of Christmas, which is purity;

the righteousness of Christmas, which is justice;

the belief in Christmas, which is truth;

the all of Christmas, which is Christ.

 ~ Wilda English

 ’Christianity is not a religion, it is a relationship.’

 ~ Dr. Thieme

 ’Christmas is not just a day, an event to be observed and speedily forgotten.  It is a spirit which should permeate every part of our lives.’

 ~ William Parks

 ’The greatest gift you will ever receive will never be found under a Christmas tree. It is far too valuable to be stored in any other place but in the depths of your heart.’

 ~ Anonymous

 ’Christmas has lost its meaning for us because we have lost the spirit of expectancy. We cannot prepare for an observance. We must prepare for an experience.’

 ~ Handel Brown

 ’The spirit of Christmas needs to superseded by the Spirit of Christ. The spirit of Christmas is annual; the Spirit of Christ is eternal. The spirit of Christmas is sentimental; the Spirit of Christ is supernatural. The spirit of Christmas is a human product; the Spirit of Christ is a divine person. That makes all the difference in the world.’

 ~ Stuart Briscoe

 ’What self denial! What self abasement! What self emptying! He, whom no infinitudes can hold, is contained within infant’s age, and infant’s form. Can it be, that the great ‘I AM THAT I AM’ shrinks into our flesh?’

 ~ Henry Law

 “I will honor Christmas in my heart, and try to keep it all year.” 

~ Charles Dickens

“Love came down at Christmas; love all lovely, love divine; love was born at Christmas, stars and angels gave the sign.” 

~ Christina G. Rossetti

 Tis the Season…this time I am sharing the ‘other’ reason for celebrating Christmas. It’s quite different from the one I’ve shared in the past isn’t it? Well, I’ve had quite a year of change! And full of surprises, it has been. I’ve grown in my understanding in so many ways, after taking a year to just be with myself. Or so I thought…

  After 32 years of looking into various ways of spirituality, the first 16, spent in studying the Bible, and then turning away and finding myself immersed deeply into the new ‘age’ spirituality for the next 16 years, I had an unexpected encounter with Yahshuah while enjoying an early morning solitude a couple of months back. He came looking for me…so, it must be time to open up and share more about my life journey…if you are open to hearing about what it’s like to find yourself suddenly on the ‘other’ side of the road, and looking over at where you once were.

 Willing to share these things with you, and all I can say is that the Peace I have unexpectedly found in this recent reunion with a resurrected man, is nothing at all like the peace I thought I was experiencing before.

 Perhaps you might be genuinely still looking to fill your spiritual hunger, as I must have been or I wouldn’t have had this experience that changed my former perspective. So far, I have been openly willing to share about my progression, content to be in the ‘right place’ a midst the new ‘age’ spirituality community, and I feel that this unexpected meeting of Yahshuah, happened for a reason and deserves to be shared as well. I did not understand what the big deal and difference was until now as I have spent the past few months learning about the differences that I could not see before, not by people, but by The Holy Spirit of God.

  I genuinely wish you all many Blessings and Well-Being ~

 May The Holy Spirit of God, shine the Light of the Babe of Christmas, not just for a one day of the year celebration, but as an everlasting reason to celebrate this season for the rest of our lives all year long.

 Tis the Season to rejoice and wish for Peace on Earth and to share the Goodwill of God towards all mankind.

   InJoy these beautiful songs by Amy Grant,

‘My Grown Up Christmas List‘

.. which speaks for each one of us, deep within our heart, whether for those who draw near to God and those who stand far off. The words speak of what we all in our very souls desire for our fellow man, the earth we share, and for our self in this physical world.

O Little Town 

This song speaks of where it all began. The Greatest Gift ever given to mankind. Where God became a man through a miraculous birth, to walk amongst us and show us the way God always intended for us to have a relationship with Himself, that had been so misunderstood. It still sits unopened by much of humanity today.

Emmanuel 

Breath of Heaven

InJoy this day genuinely,

May you be touched in Love with the Spirit of Yahshuah who desires to gift you with His Presence!

Merry Christmas! Tis the Season ~

Julia

Copyright © 2008 - 2011 You-Nique-By-Design.com

Public domain free image

‘When eating bamboo sprouts, remember the man who planted them.’

~ Chinese Proverb

‘Feeling gratitude and not expressing it is like wrapping a present and not giving it.’

~ William Arthur Ward

‘You say grace before meals.  All right.  But I say grace before the concert and the opera, and grace before the play and pantomime, and grace before I open a book, and grace before sketching, painting, swimming, fencing, boxing, walking, playing, dancing and grace before I dip the pen in the ink.’

~ G.K. Chesterton

‘Grace isn’t a little prayer you chant before receiving a meal.  It’s a way to live.’

~ Source Unknown

‘Praise the bridge that carried you over.’

~ George Colman

And so with these thoughts on thanksgiving, I wish each and everyone a joyous day of new beginnings. To begin this day sanctioned as Thanksgiving Day, to choose to live a life of giving thanks daily, by having  eyes that are centered and focused on what we have to be thankful for. Let’s try this for this ongoing year. Spend a couple of dollars on tools to help you do the ‘accounting’. A pocket sized notebook and a pen or a pencil, and every day, find one thing to be thankful for and write it down. Remember to date it. Just one thing. If you have more, by all means, write it down. Tuck this little book somewhere close by within reach. And then, once we run out of room in this little notebook, well….surely we will find that we can afford another. And including the contrasts that make what to be thankful for ’stand out’, as is referred to in George Colman’s quote.

Here’s to making a lifestyle grounded in giving thanks, and letting go of a lifestyle of moaning about what we don’t have now or yet.

I created this card for all. I took this photo of this lovely tree just weeks before letting go of living in Kansas City. A year has passed and now, I am finding new eyes to see life and I share my Joy with you ~

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!!

From my Heart to yours ~ I am thankful for you!

InJoy!

Many Blessings InLove and gratitude,

Julia

 Copyright © 2008 - 2011 You-Nique-By-Design.com

Photo and Card Designed InLove by Julia ©

‘A compliment is something like a kiss through a veil. ‘

~ Victor Hugo

Hello to all, this is a response to comments left here requesting a response . I wish to say thank you very much for taking the time to write to me and for your kind thoughts towards me. I am not one to ignore others however, I ask one thing, that when you leave a comment, would you be so kind as to leave your genuine real name, if only your first name and for now, your genuine email without the advertising.

I genuinely have an interest in each one I meet as a real person, and do understand that we are living in a diverse universe with people who come from all walks of life…you know, a butcher, a baker, a candlestick maker and then some…

 My blog was created to reveal me as opening my door and letting people see into this being called Julia. Julia is my real name, and my blog reflects my passage through the process of being on a spiritual path for over thirty years now. Seems hard to believe in moments…

Moving from the church years, through the new age Spirituality of consciousness and now, radically turning around and seeing not a ‘religion’ of any kind so much as it all kept showing up in ways to be…and this was what I could not sit completely still for…ah…

I am looking into some of the suggestions you have made regarding the browser issues some of you are and have been experiencing in reading my blog. Computer technology is still a very new learning arena for me, and I am moving at a snail’s pace in becoming more adept in computerese. I thank you for your patience.

I will also be more than happy to address the other comments about follow ups on previous blogs as well as questions regarding blogging. I have been ‘toying’ with the idea of beginning a facebook page to be able to interact with all who have posted comments here. I am open to hearing back about this so feel free to leave a response.

It seems the comments set-up has changed with WordPress from when I first began this blog. It’s not a simple click to add comment any longer so this is why I am considering having a facebook page dedicated to responding to all the wonderful comments you are leaving. Thank you very much.

I am undergoing a huge change in my life right now, I am in the midst of experiencing what it is like to keep a promise made to myself to give myself a whole year to  just be me being me, no matter what. Open to whatever would open up in my way to really let my authentic self be in company with herself. And listen, by paying close attention to what showed up in silence and less outside conversations except by choice.

It’s been interesting to say the least…and I find, it’s really been about surrender. Having to lay down all of my projects begun but still not quite finished yet, like crayons and paper left sprawled all over the floor, left in the midst of activity…and uncovering the purpose for it. Hard to do this? Yes. Worthwhile, no doubts whatsoever, YES!

My writing will reflect these changes and I honestly hope that you will come along and continue to grow with me, as I am willing to reveal what has unfolded in my process of being still, and listening, and hearing God in the quiet speaking to me about me In Love, in order for me to become like a child again, full of faith and trusting in the process of my life.

For now, Thank you again for all your comments.

I wish you well ~

InJoy this day,

Blessings In the Spirit of Love,

Julia

Copyright © 2008 - 2011 You-Nique-By-Design.com

Image by flicker

“It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye.”

~ Antoine de Saint-Exupery

‘The ultimate lesson all of us have to learn is unconditional love, which includes not only others but ourselves as well.’

~ Elizabeth Kubler-Ross

‘The beginning of love is to let those we love be perfectly themselves, and not to twist them to fit our own image. Otherwise we love only the reflection of ourselves we find in them.’

~ Thomas Merton

‘The rule of unconditional love; it is in the giving that you make the other person realize.’

~ Unknown

‘Love sometimes wants to do us a great favor: hold us upside down and shake all the nonsense out.’

~ Hafiz of Persia

“And so we know and rely on the love God has for us. God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in him.”

~ 1 John 4:16

In late 2007, I joined a forum, known as Our Ultimate Reality Forums, put together by Adrian Cooper, a man whom I now consider as my friend.  It is a global forum with people of all faiths coming in to mingle with others who all have foundational beliefs (realized or not), that are quite different from each one of ourselves. A most wonderful place full of opportunities to be able to discuss, agree and disagree on all subjects that matter to each one. A very diverse community where one can experience  growing in their Spirituality.

I began a thread in the Religions and Traditions Board titled;  Definitions of Meanings, Speaking in Spiritual Language. I sensed to begin this thread in order to allow us all to see what we understood about the various terms used in the Spiritual arena. Bringing into the Light for clarifying what we felt their meaning was to each one of us, and perhaps uncover more InSight into a meaning that would deepen our you-nique understanding of a word, and enlarge our view. Growing in our perspective of these meanings, and how we might be able to make greater use of them in our everyday living through the practicing of our newly gained understanding. Becoming skilled in our practicing, bringing theories and practical living together into one place. Into us and living it out. And through this process, gaining more practice in becoming effective communicators with ourself and others.

The idea came through to be expressed much like having a Family Night, where we would have the opportunity to gather together in the Great Room, and play games together, in order to learn about ourself and those around us. This forum being a gathering place in itself for one’s who desired to be Lights shining in this world of UnConditional LOVE. And so, my very first post was on asking what does the definition of UnConditional LOVE mean to you?

I have to say that if anyone were to read through all of my experiences as I have moved through this forum in the past three and a half years, you may find yourself laughing at me, getting mad at me, shocked at some of my language, and even hurling angry insults at me in moments. And through this whole experience, I can only say, that I am so deeply grateful for this wonderful opportunity to grow so much in my Spiritual process through all the interactions I have had in this forum.

It is a most wonderful place, to really get to know ourself through our relating with others. I’ve learned that no matter what another says to me about me, it says more about the person saying it, than it does about me. And this applies to myself as well, in what I say to, or about another. I have learned again and again, that whatever I say, is my own words expressing from what is inside of me. I am the owner of my thoughts, emotions, words and deeds, and this is where it rests. The buck stops here. I’ve grown more Self responsible through this wonderful adventure of moving through this forum with everyone there.

Thank you my Precious Family at OUR.

In my quirky childlike imagination, of loving stories; I can see Owls’s and Eeyore’s, Rabbit’s, Piglet’s, Kanga and Roo’s and Pooh Bear’s, Tigger’s, and even Christopher Robin, in this Hundred Acres Woods of unfolding stories.

All in all though, having a common place to gather together with fellow souls on this life journey, as well as here in my blog has been a most rewarding experience in my life. And so, a funny thing has happened to me along the way while moving throughout the rooms of this forum, and I would also come in here, my blog, which is like having my own room to sit in and reflect and write down the impressions flowing through my Heart as it was experiencing authentically in the midst of all the activity going on all around me outside my inner door…

Here is what flowed through this morning in my quiet time, while in my inner sanctuary.  I felt deeply moved in my Heart to express in the Definitions and Meanings post today with my fellow souls, about how the meaning of UnConditional LOVE has changed alot for me, many times throughout my life’s progression, and very recently, I heard something so clearly, and felt this ‘Click’ inside that brought inner and outer together in a moment, and I had to share what can only be experienced in understanding Heart Language and received only by another who listens with their Heart ~

I’m posting my written expression here, and the link is above should anyone want to see this woman, walking, slipping and sliding, stumbling and falling, yet, getting right back up, washing herself off, and keeping onward with her journey in this world as long as I have breath left in me.

Be Blessed, Be Well In Your Being ~

Thank you My Beloved Friend Adrian, for your generous Heart in opening up this Forum for those who desire to grow and evolve in their Spiritual Journey.

InJoy this day,

May this expression be received in the Spirit in which it given ~

From A Love that Never fails us, that sticks closer than skin all throughout our journey here.

In LOVE UnConditionally,

Julia

From Definitions and Meanings ~

Hello Everyone,

A while ago, one of the definition cards drawn was LOVE, or rather UnConditional LOVE. Opened up for anyone to give their impression of it…the idea of this thread was much like having family night, where cards are played around the table together. So many you-nique expressions that are shared and not shared. Yes, we all have freewill.

I’m coming back to this card; Unconditional LOVE, and sharing something about this LOVE that mystified me for a very long while, and going through the sifting and sorting process of mmm and ahh…

UnConditional LOVE has changed in meaning for me. Alot. Now, after playing with the pieces of this puzzle for years, something clicked into place for me, quite recently actually. I’ve gone through a process of letting go of anything that once defined what love meant to me, as in, where I was still looking for this love. And as each person, place and thing has come and gone on, slipping through my fingers, I kept moving through each cycle learning to let go of this and then that and then when I looked at this once filled space now left empty, I let it remain empty to see what would happen, and I walked on. I’ve moved from grasping tightly to these things, to loosening my grip and then gripping at the last minute before they disappeared from sight and on into, letting them follow the natural cycle of life…

Unconditional Love. It’s what cannot be changed in Its essence, Its nature. You’ve said this before Julia. Yes I have. I’ve expressed what is so hard to describe in mere words. Its something that can only be understood and expressed in a language of the Heart.

This kind of LOVE, is not shaken by anything that happens. When my inner and outer world was being shaken by events unfolding in my life, I did not see nor understand this for a very long time, that whatever can be shaken, is not UnConditional LOVE. This is why these events were happening in my life. They were my own and others ideas and forms of love that were being shaken and loosened, to remove whatever was not of this kind of LOVE.

There is a kind of LOVE that cannot be shaken or changed by any outer circumstance or appearance. Its the LOVE that remains after everything and everyone else is gone from our presence, our awareness. We all love with human love, each and everyone of us, and I see from my own blended experience, that it is very very easy to confuse the two. What is human love and what is this ‘other kind’ of LOVE.

There is a LOVE that sticks closer than a brother. And IT is this LOVE that has opened my eyes to see this. It stuck closer than a brother, closer than skin and after awhile, it sinks in. It takes time for most of us to ‘get it’.

It’s a no matter what kind of LOVE, IT will do whatever is in the best interest for the ‘object-ive’ of Its LOVE.

Because to do otherwise, It would have to deny Its very essence which is LOVE.

I say this with LOVE, that we seem so often, to confuse our ideas with this Greater One’s Idea of LOVE.

To understand IT, we have to be willing to merge with IT, in order to receive this LOVE to share with others, because we are so use to doing love our way, and we really tend to withdraw from ones who do not do things our way. It’s our commonly shared human nature to be this way. It comes from experiencing this LOVE being interpersonal and interactive in our life that we eventually can see the difference of when we are being loving with personal interests (hidden, unspoken yet still expected) and when we have no expectations from another having to give us anything in return to be able to be LOVING towards someone else outside our self or friend or stranger to us.

Do I only help those people whom I like? Or am I willing to help someone who may be a stranger to me in this moment? All our friends were possible stranger’s to us at first. Or what about the person who made our lives a living hell at work or school or in our neighborhood or even within our own family? What if something happened to them and they needed help. Would I be willing to give it, by letting go of their past behaviour, and seeing them as a fellow Child of GOD, whether their soul was a regenerated one or not yet? By my willingness to be a vessel that extends UnConditional LOVE towards my ‘enemies’, it may be the very act that opens them to receiving in this kind of LOVE. It may awaken them to their own unregenerated soul that needs a drink of living Spirit water to regenerate them, as IT has for us. This kind of LOVE isn’t something that can be hoarded to ourself. In fact, it’s impossible to be selfish with it.

UnConditional LOVE is not the norm in this world. And in these days we are living in, the Light of this kind of LOVE, really will stand out when I am willing, when we are willing to be filled with IT, to overflowing and sharing with all we meet in how we act out with one another.

UnConditional LOVE is the oil intended for our lamps.

InJoy this day All ~

In the Spirit of UnConditional LOVE,

Julia 

Copyright © 2008 - 2011 You-Nique-By-Design.com

 Image by imagehosting.com

All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the servant of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.

~ 2 Timothy 3:16-17

Above all, you must understand that no prophecy of Scripture came about by the prophet’s own interpretation of things.
For prophecy never had its origin in the human will, but prophets, though human, spoke from God as they were carried along by the Holy Spirit.

~ 2 Peter 1:20-21

Living in a world where consciousness has become the ‘new world religion’ of Spirituality, and being an active participant of it, I have been experiencing a growing desire, to express what has been pressing upon my Heart to share. I’ve been noticing something popping up and quietly eyeing it for awhile, waiting to see if it would continue to rise…

I participate in a wonderful global Spiritual forum,  and it is a diverse community of people coming in from all walks of life, a safe haven for the most part, where we can all share from our own personal experiences about how the unfolding nature of our lives lived has changed and formed us into the people we are today.

I see that most of us have come from some form of indoctrinated religious background for the most part, and want to be as far removed from fundamental religion as possible. This is understandable. For our original birthright given, was our right to be free. Free to make our own choices, free to think and act for ourselves. The key here is given. To have something given denotes there being a Giver, and a receiver.

In our desire to be free, I see that sometimes we lose sight of this very freedom, when we begin to act and speak in exactly
the same attitude, the very same intonation we have been walking away from to get free of. In order to validate our point of view, we must invalidate others way in order to say that our way is the right one. In an odd sort of way, we become the very thing we say we are not. We become the new religious leaders, teaching and preaching doctrines and dogma. We lose sight of the meaning of the InSpired message.

We begin to die by the letter of the Law, and not Live by The Spirit. Being In-Spirit is what InSpired means. So many seem to be living from the idea of having to pull something out of themself, in order to be spiritual. Spirit comes into and flows through a person. This is the meaning of being Inspired. It comes in unexpectedly and flows through us and not by mustering it up in ourself. Spirit Inspired is not human derived.

We speak of the insanity of repeating the same thing over and over again, yet, we seem to leave The Spirit out of our daily equation. Hearing that it’s all up to us to ‘pull something out of ourself’ to save the planet, while Spirit is right here, at the ready to InSpire us, by our including IT in our lives. Isn’t the reason we are currently in our modern day conditions from attempting to pull something out of us already? We are for the most part forgetting the Giver. I sense this is a reason our world is currently experiencing such troubled times. We are indeed consumers. How often are we eating a meal without a second thought to say thank you. When was the last time, we consciously gave thanks for what we have or are receiving? Without a long list of I want’s, or until I have all what I wants, I ain’t gonna be thankful mentality, in order to  be able to say Thank You, my needs are met.  We just don’t seem to give it a second thought…

The reason I chose these particular texts from the Bible in this blog, is because a point is being made in the very saying, that the writer’s wrote as being InSpired, GOD Breathed, The Holy Spirit moving through them as vessels of communication to write to us, mankind. That, and the fact that the Bible has become the most controversial Book of our times. I’ve always been a curious one, wanting to see what all the commotion is about…which is what led me into my Church experience in the first place, and then out again, to explore what else was going on in the world of Spirituality.

I was once upon a time ago, a serious student of the Bible. I spent most of my time alone with it, and invited The Holy Spirit to be my teacher and guide. And I made use of fluid intelligence to discern from what I received in my inner chamber sessions, with what I was hearing from the teachings of the Church.  I left the Church behind. Nothing happens by accident.  I am being nudged to go back in and take another look at what is written in this book, after a very long sabbatical. There is a Spirit of Power contained within its words,  as a Light to guide our lives by seeing past our limited interpretation of it, and it is able to change a life from one of bondage into freedom. By inviting the Spirit of Truth in, also known as The Holy Spirit, into our studying of it. Open to receiving Its Divine Wisdom, Discernment and Guidance. The Spirit gives Wisdom, discernment and guidance to be able to uncover and understand the deeper meanings that are waiting to be revealed underneath the written words upon the pages. GOD expressing ITSelf through the Bible’s various writer’s, who wrote as they were InSpired by GOD through their pen’s. Filled with Spirit flowing through their hands upon the page.   As we can be, Being InSpired, Moving as GOD’s Breath through us..

I can hear people piping up with yes, but it has been corrupted by so many translations. I agree. Man has indeed corrupted the original meaning. This is why I InCourage inviting Spiritual Assistance whether one is reading the texts in the Bible, The Tao, The Upanishads, or any other Spiritual texts. So we can see past the limitations of our own thinking and open to a Greater Mind’s Perspective. There are those who have been so put off by fundamental theology that they refuse to have anything to do with the Bible, filing it under the label of religion, as being the only religious book. Which becomes another form of limited ‘belief’. It’s a restrictive belief formed by listening to ingrained conditioning by other’s manmade opinions of a Spirit Breathed Nature of communication. And until we are willing to look into something that challenges us and know why, we will live from a smaller perspective, basically mistranslating it because we have not taken time to look into it, or get to know what it is saying and why. Is something making us uncomfortable when we read it? What is it?

The Bible in and of itself, as well as Yahshua, have nothing at all do with fundamental religion when seen in their True context. What I find interesting is that while so many people constantly slam the Bible, they never seem to stop and consider, that out of  all  Spiritual texts ever written, ‘why has this one book, out of all these other one’s, been the most tampered with?’ What is in this book’s message that was, or is so important to keep hidden from reaching the people in this world?

We won’t know until we are willing to accept the challenge of finding out for ourself, by inviting The Spirit who breathed ITSELF through it, to relate ITs intended meaning of it, with us. It takes leaving manmade ideas outside the door. Enter in, empty minded and come and see for your self.

Religion means to bind together, bring into one. Can this not be said of defining all Spiritual groups? Communities are formed by their teachings agreeing with people. Who then bind themselves together, sharing a sense of the same values, and moral codes. Distinguishing themself from others. In other words, this is no different than what is aleady going on, just a differently formed ‘religious’ group. What happens is that the larger the group, the more people ‘conform’ or are ‘converted’. Let’s face it, the hardest thing for most of us to do, is to be ourself no matter what others are doing, or thinking. And anyone who thinks for themself, usually does not have a large group of people around them. They are too busy Being what is Breathing them. It takes awhile for the collective consciousness to accept a thought that differs from the whole. They reject it first. It’s the way of balance. From one extreme to another and then back to Center.

InSpired means to be In Spirit-GOD Breathed. And when something is InSpired, while it may go through tons of translations,  it is in asking The Spirit who Breathed it, for guidance and discernment, the Wisdom to know what is True and what is not.  This allows us InSight to recognize when something in a translation is not fully opening up to the original InSpired message. Does this mean that the message is lost? Only in an un-inspired translation.  The meaning is here, even when the words are not conveying the original meaning of the message. We must prepare ourself to hear a message in the same way it was delivered.  In Spirit, not from or of our flesh, InSpiration comes in through our flesh. And when we are not In Spirit, and reading something spiritual, we are reading it in the possibility of opening to a spirit of error. Something to consider.

It does help to ask for InSight in order to be able to receive the gift of the InSpired message. I find when something is Inspired, it has a way of speaking to us in one of two ways. In one way, it burns in our conscience, sometimes it feels like a searing fire, when we are deeply hiding from something. Like a knife cutting through the cords that hold us a prisoner until we are cut free. But most of the time, it is like a soft ember, that glows in the dark. It reveals something that must be seen, and let go of, in order for Light to move through us, to purify us. This is what Light does, It purifies us, so we can be free from hiding. The other way, is that it reinforces the evidence that Light is in us. How? We are known by our fruits. Spiritual Fruit is the outer evidence of Being filled with The Life of The Holy Spirit moving through our Being, our outer conduct and our attitudes are changed and it’s noticeable to our self and others.

InSpired messages stir us up to stand tall and rise into our full stature. Being rightminded towards those we meet in our everyday living. And our behavior and attitudes reveals which Spirit we are listening to. The Spirit of Truth which Lights our way, or the spirit of error which is like the blind leading the blind, we stumble when we are off in our way.

InSpiration changes us from the inside out.

We are facing times of great change, and it is very important that we hold to listening to The Spirit of Truth, and not the spirit of error. The Bible happens to give some practical ways to be able to discern what these fruits are. If we are open minded to include it in our Spirituality. Leaving no stone unturned…And so, in closing, I am including the text from Galatians 5, on the Fruits of the Spirit.

‘But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.
Against such things there is no law.’

~ Galatians 5:22-23

The fruits of Living InSpirit. InSpired Living. And the wonderful thing about this as a guideline, is that it is something for all of us to be able to see if we are walking In the Light of Love’s Spirit. It’s level ground to walk upon together, no matter what faith we say we are of, in this world.

It’s a Universal guideline of whether or not we are being GOD Breathed Beings, by allowing the Light of GOD’s Spirit to come into us, to flow through us, especially in these changing times in our world.

Many Blessings, Be Well,

 In the Spirit of Truth,

I InCourage you to receive The Gift of The Holy Spirit to fill you, allowing the Light of ITs understanding in, so that you can…

InJoy this day,

bearing the fruits of this Love’s Radiant Light, Breathing ITSelf into this world, through you ~

God Breathed, Expressing InLove through,

Julia

Copyright © 2008 - 2011 You-Nique-By-Design.com

‘True friendship is a plant of slow growth, and must undergo and withstand the shocks of adversity before it is entitled to the appellation.’

~ George Washington

‘Relationships are our primary teacher. They are the context in which we either grow into the consciousness of God,
or deny ourselves and others the opportunity to do so.’

~ Marianne Williamson, from A Year of Daily Wisdom Calendar

The Building Blocks of Genuine Communication ~

Planting and building a True and Healthy friendship, requires open and honest communication. Being honest with another develops our courage in becoming more Authentic, being our Real self with another. Otherwise, there can be a foundation of distrust being built upon. We sense something is being kept back, hidden from each other. We are hiding how we feel by not being honest and leveling with someone. We are sentient beings. As such, we all are able to sense when someone is holding something back from us, and know when we ourselves are not saying what is really on our own Hearts to share. We are hoarding a part of our self from sharing something that may be of great value for a friend to hear…

‘A friend can tell you things you don’t want to tell yourself.’
~ Unknown

Changing From a Problem Oriented Mind into a Solution Oriented Mind ~

When a conflict arises, we can view it as an opportunity for us to change the way we see the relationship we are in. By changing the way we see things or how we are communicating with another, allows us to uncover other ways to promote deeper growth within a relationship.  While being openly honest can be uncomfortable, it can create stronger bonds of trust, by discovering if  our values are in harmony with another. When our words are Lovingly Intended, it can help the relationship to grow. A conflict can be appreciated for gaining clarity. To be able to see what the values of each person’s are, and define what matters in order of importance. We can choose how we are going to respond, whether to proceed, or not. This is where our Power lies, in our ability to make choices.

Conflicts are most certain to occur. How we choose to respond to another can change the outcome of a conflict between two people.  Are we just being petty? Or is this really about something we cannot live with in peace. In order to preserve the relationship, we must face our friend with Loving Integrity, by being willing to be vulnerable and honest in communicating with them. We are not being honest, when we tell a half truth, or avert our real feelings to avoid ‘hurting’ someone’s feelings.  By not coming clean with them, we either say nothing at all, or talk around the subject. We are avoiding the issue. It’s there, it bothers us, and yet we keep from bringing it up or we change the subject. This is a form of delay. Are we afraid of losing the relationship? Maybe we have become too comfortable with our patterns and aren’t ready to change our self yet. So, we save face out of the grounds of feeling fearful, and not loving. We are hiding behind a mask. We lose our heart, our courage of being the real ‘me’, while secretly stewing inside, because we feel betrayed. From this place, something begins to build up inside of us. A case is growing against the very person we say we love! We keep looking for excuses to find them guilty of something in order to get to the real issue! Once we have enough ‘evidence’ built up, the pressure to hold it in becomes too much, the lid comes off, and this is how our ‘truth’ often gets expressed in anger, and not in love. We lose our connection.
 

An Ounce of Prevention is Worth a Pound of Cure ~

A way to prevent this from happening repeatedly, is to take a deeper look inside ourselves for the reasons that might be causing it to happen. As we open up to understanding ourselves more intimately, we will see if we are being honest with our self or hiding, and whether the person we feel has betrayed us, is really our self. Perhaps our behavior isn’t matching our innermost values. What we place our genuine and utmost importance upon that gives us our meaning in life. Finding out what our real values are, and addressing it, is InPowering. If we are not really being a true friend to our self, by not being honest with our self first, then how can we be a true friend with Integrity, with any one else for that matter? It begins with our self being the groundwork of all our relationships to be built upon.

Conflicts Can Enlarge Our Perspective on Reality ~

Experiencing a conflict is similar in experience to a plant that has outgrown its container. It must be uprooted and transplanted into a larger pot with more soil, in order for it to continue to grow healthy, and to prosper. This gives the roots greater space to grow its perspective reality, opening up more room for it to expand. This can also cause a temporary shock to the plant’s accustomed restricted system.

Speaking our True Heart in a healthy loving manner can feel similar to this, especially when it involves having a difficult conversation for the very first time. This is why being real and honest takes courage to speak from our Heart with a friend. And how the relationship continues to grow from this or not, will determine how strong the relationship’s foundation really is, or was in the first place.

Experiencing a conflict can serve as a way for helping us to review our innermost intentions. Bringing into our awareness the necessity to evaluate whether there are any hidden motives, guises, or deceptions lurking around inside of us. Are we relying upon old ways of relating, using outdated values, which no longer serve us in reaching our desired outcome from where we once were? Are we basing our current values from our past history of relationships to carry us through? Is it time for a change, a time to get alone and re-view our values? Re-evaluating them will reveal what is most important to us right now; show us where we are, and where we are no longer, to grow into larger roots of experience.

When our words match our conduct, we find we have the inner strength to move us through the bumps of a difficult conversation. We will know the difference from when we are being petty and can let it go, and when we cannot compromise on our most important values. Communication like this builds a foundation of deepening trust in all our relationships. Being a friend who has Integrity and is honest in word and deed, is a great foundation to plant and build a life upon that will benefit any relationship you have. This character trait can be applied in friendships, business, and family, and in loving partnerships…

 Are We Transfering Blame and Self Responsibility onto Another? ~

‘When you blame others, you give up your power to change.’

~ Dr. Robert Anthony

 Raise your hand, if you can say you have real and genuine friends by the bucketfuls, I am speaking here of people who really know the inner most you?

I would say, that while it is not impossible, it is usually an unrealistic expectation for most of us. Why is that? Because in order to have deep and meaningful relationships, it takes spending quality time to get to know someone well enough to build a safe environment together. One in which both feel safe enough to be vulnerable, in order to have open minded and honest loving communications. It doesn’t happen through small talk, by talking around things, hinting at things, while never really coming right out and saying how you really feel about what’s important to you. Going through all this, is entertaining a hidden expectation of the other to be able to read your mind for you! A verbal guessing game of Charades. Read My Mind, not my lips game playing.  We are silently asking our friend to be our mind reader for us, so the responsibility of our emotions and convictions is actually being focused  upon and placed outside of ourself, and onto them. We are asking them to feel for us, and know what they should automatically just know, to make us feel loved, without ever asking or communicating what exactly it is we need from them ourself! It’s like wanting to have a relationship without participating as a mutual partner in it!

Sounds like a relationship that happens in one’s head while not being Present in living it out.

 Some Helpful Tools for Uncovering Our Most Important Values ~

 Asking outright questions is also an effective way to see if our friend’s values are in agreement with ours.

Questions like; ‘What do you value the most about our relationship?’

Then give them the opportunity to express what this is without judging. Judging seems to happen when we have hidden expectations, usually yet to be expressed, and they are not being met. So, listen as though this is the first converstation you have ever had with them, and then show them that you are listening to them by rephrasing what they have shared. Make eye contact, and put all activities to the side for a moment and check your feelings as they arise when hearing your friend’s or partner’s response.

Re-viewing our values a couple of times a year, at least more than once in our lifetime, is also an effective tool, because we change so much through the years. My values are much different now from when I was twenty, when planting and building a family was of primary importance. It doesn’t mean my family is not important to me now, yet, my family is grown, and busy too, and this allows me to focus on what I am doing with myself right now, I have opportunities to repot myself into a larger life of experiences. A time to re-draw my map due to re-charting my course.

 Developing A Relationship With Ourself ~

So, in order to get an idea of how I will draw my map with a compass, I ask myself, ‘What is most important to me right now in order to feel fulfilled in myself at this time in my life? What do I want to experience in areas that matter to me?

Become curious about yourself.

 I am still moving through a transition and with every step I am making active choices based on what I sense in response. I am more fully attentive in my day, and this inner listening is revealing some deep and amazing InSights about myself. I’ve become more understanding of other people, as I grow more aware of understanding of myself. The way I have noticed this shift, is by asking more Heartfilled and meaningful questions of myself. I’ve then asked my family and friends, what is most important to them in their personal relationships as well.  The answers I am receiving back are revealing to me what is important to each one in my circle of life.

It’s helping me to become a better friend to my family and friends, by understanding what they value the most too.

And what is even more interesting, is that while their responses are all you-niquely expressed, at the Heart of the matter, they all said basically the same thing. That what we all value the most about having a desire to experience relationships with others, is the experience we have in sensing being worthwhile, of genuinely mattering to someone because they matter to us too. By connecting with those who have the same values at Heart, it makes us feel like we are giving value to another’s life, which gives us our sense of feeling valued in return.  Feeling dignified and respected,  mutually.

Responses from loved ones, ages 23 through past 85 years, male and female, who responded to my question,

‘What is Most Important to You about personal relationships?’

 A guideline, to help you in making the choices that will get you where you desire to be. That’s the potential of asking the right questions. Whether it is about the quality of personal relationships you desire to experience, what kind of business you would like to be involved in, when looking to choose a career to pursue, how you desire to experience your Spirituality, your state of health, and last but by no means least, assisting you in uncovering your passion in Life. Find out what is most important to you in the areas that matter most to you in your life. It will help you to design a map to reach a destination to arrive at, along with developing a map and a compass on how to get yourself there.

It may just lead you to your North Star.

Maintaining A Spiritual Perspective Builds Added Support For Our Relationships ~

‘When we can’t piece together the puzzle of our own lives, remember the best view of a puzzle is from above. Let Him help put you together.’

~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

‘Just as a candle cannot burn without fire, men cannot live without a spiritual life.’

~ Buddha

Integrating a Spiritual perspective in our lives, can give us a different view through increasing our InSightful awareness, into whether we are choosing to allow our ego to come forward and lead in our relationships and wreak havoc, or to move it to its rightful place, by listening and acting on cues from Spirit to guide you. And one way I have found to evaluate whether it is the ego in me leading, (or in another I am relating with), is by taking the time to evaluate my inner state of being. Am I feeling peaceful inside or is there an unrestful conflict tumbling around in there? Follow the source of your unrestful feeling. Does a face come to mind or a situation? You are now able to see more clearly where the cause is coming from in your unrest. Are you focusing on someone or something in the outer or inner world of your reality? Feel the energy of the person who you are relating with and then, ask them open ended questions, like, ‘what’s most important to you about this matter right now? ‘How can I understand you better?’ And by all means ask yourself too. So you can have a healthy, honest, conversation through practicing effective communication. This is an opportunity to grow in your ability to become a True Friend to another. You will be blessed as your other is blessed in kind.

Open and honest communication leaves no room for assuming you know something about the way another is feeling or thinking, when in fact, you very well may not.

Ego’s forté is about wanting to be special in a way that excludes all others. A special ‘case’. It stands out by forcing things, or focusing on ways to capture someone’s attention. Wanting to be special in this way, can lead us into behaviors of competiveness. ‘I have to be better than someone else’ to stand out idea, or wanting to win someone over to our side.  I am only asking you to consider what is being shared here…to shift your perceptual attentiveness in possibly turning this idea around…and seeing it in another way ~

‘The ego seeks to use other people to fulfill our needs as we define them. When we try to use a relationship to serve our own purposes, we falter because we are reinforcing our illusion of need.’

~ Marianne Williamson, fro A Year of Daily Wisdom Calendar

When we are being our real and authentic self spontaneously, without striving to be something outside of ourself,  we are being ourself without any hidden motives, guises or deceptions. Busy drumming up ideas of setting traps, in order to snag someone’s attention.  We will naturally stand out when we are being genuine.  We’ve all known and perhaps been people who spend alot of time being engaged in the other way of attracting someone’s attention. Placing alot of energy into being anything and everything but ourselves. Posturing. Trying harder and harder to convince others why they should choose to be with us more than another. We will end up with being surrounded by people who expect us to keep up the facade of who they want us to be in order to remain attracted to our facade. Finding that it gets harder to maintain a facade and any relationship in this way.

 Genuine Love Is About Freedom of Choice

Genuine, Authentic Love, is about being with someone because you willingly choose to be with them out of the pure Joy of delighting in their presence. They do not have to do anything but be who they are au naturelle. It is grounded  upon genuine acceptance. No one is looking to change the other, just enjoy their company the way they are, and the feeling is mutual. Friends in mutual relationship go through the changes together by natural rhythms and cycles in progression. It’s a walk together through the seasons of a naturally unfolding relationship, into enjoying the full fruits of maturity.

Relationships present themselves to us as a gift of opportunity, to grow larger in our consciousness of GOD, by being able to understand more deeply what GOD consciousness means to us, through living in relationship with another.

‘True friendship starts the moment one person says to another “What? You too? I thought I was the only one!’

~ C.S. Lewis

True Friends are ones who are able to share in your dreams with equally shared enthusiasm, ones who support you in maintainig your highest values, being in alignment with you, because they too have love and respect to share with you. They also love and respect themself in a healthy way, and know what is most important to them also.

Don’t Compromise Your Inner Most Heart Values

Have you ever experienced yourself sharing your dreams with people you thought were your friends, who expected you to compromise your most important values to be able to be considered a friend of theirs? Finding out later on, that their highest values were actually aligned with your lowest ones?  In other words, for them to remain as a friend, it would take giving up our integrity, our sense of fairness of treating others as equals, having to compromise what is most important to our self, in order for them to be willing to support us in reaching our dreams, or to even be a friend to us?

Have you ever been in a place where you have to choose whether to give in and cater to your lower values over living by your higher ones, just to be able to have a friend? Well, compromising our values is what leads us into a state of conflict inside of ourself. Our actions and attitudes have the ability to make our dreams realized or not. We should not ever  compromise our self for anyone if we truly are living from a Heart of integrity. It’s Wisdom that tells us to share our dreams with people who are willing to hold us accountable to our higher values, who are equally willing for us to hold them accountable to their higher values. Living from a Heart of Integrity in themselves, and towards all others, based on being fair, seeing level ground for all others as we do . Living from right mindedness, which does not mean being right at all costs. It comes from Loving actively from healthy and wholesome values that allows us to make consistently wise choices that move us forward and not backwards in our life.

By doing what is right for the one being Loved even when it means being misunderstood in moments.

Living from a no strings attached, no hidden guises, no hidden motives, no deceptive value system.

What Does Commitment Really Mean?

Being willing to make a commitment to our self, is an opportunity to grow into being commited to a relationshipwith another person. Do we maintain a relationship through thick and thin, or are we really only in this relationship for the feel good times only, and become gun shy when the rapids begin to show signs of getting a little bit choppy and rough. Some are. And this is fine, it just might not be for you. So let go and make room for one who aligns with your values, your idea of what is most important to you in a relationship. Trust, Respect, Caring, Compassion, Connection, Honesty, Integrity, Loyalty, Warmth and Kindness, Planting and Building something together that lasts.

A way to find out how committed we are to our self is by taking inventory of how many promises we have made to our self that we have kept and not kept. And then follow through by taking inventory of how many promises we have kept with another or not kept. Are we being true to our word by following through with it?

Learning How to Make A Commitment, Begins With Keeping Your Word To Yourself

This is what is being shown to me right now about myself. How to grow in becoming more committed to my own self values, so I can be more committed in my relationship with others, or to one idea, in order to reach a desired destination. I realize that it takes going through some conflicts in order to remove the rough edges, so the diamond that is in here, can be uncovered in its fullness. How I handle the conflicts through communication reveals my Heartmost commitment to honestly living by my values or not. The conflicts are what draw our attention towards or away from our authentic value system. Revealing our level of authenticity. Do we mean what we say?

…’Love Believes All Things…’ ~ 1 Corinthians 13:7

Are we big enough to do this together by being committed to seeing it through, so that we all reach our Greater Good together?

 I say yes, we are.

A Commitment is an alignment of my words matching my behavior. What I say, I do. It takes a commitment to show up and be equally supportive of you in realizing your dreams no matter how I may feel in the moment. Even when I feel like doing something else that appeals to me more, in the moment. When my emotions aren’t matching my once made promise. I’ve made a promise to you and keeping it or not, is seeing whether the rubber meets the road or not. And thank you for being willing to be equally supportive in helping me to realize my own dreams, even when it is not always convenient to do so. I have come to understand that I must be careful in making a promise, to really be honest if I really do not feel that I can meet a friend’s request, make a commitment. It’s important to be there for someone all in one place, especially when the promise is being made. The commitment is in keeping our word as we have given it. Action matching ~ feeling ~ matching thoughts.

For instance, a friend has asked us to help them with a cleaning up their over grown yard next weekend, the day arrives and lo, another friend calls an hour before we are to leave, and invites us to see a movie we have been wanting to see, and we make a choice in this moment. Will we keep our promise to our first friend, by commiting to our word, or will we break our promise, and not follow through on giving our word. A commitment is what allows us to maintain the integrity of our word by following through with what we said we would do, no matter what else crops us to distract us off course. It’s a trait of loyalty and honesty being revealed in our character. What helps when these situations arise, is to ask ourself a question. ‘What is most important to me in this situation. Is it to help my friend as I promised I would, or to choose the fun option, and go see this movie?’ ’Do I keep my promise or do I break my promise, and make an excuse?’ Funny thing is, that in breaking the promise, we might just run into our friend we broke the promise to, since we did not show up. Finding out that they’ve been wanting to see the same movie too. And this is where open and honest communication can be very uncomfortable,  yet very necessary for a relationship to be able to build and grow deeper, or not.

Our ability to keep our promises to our self and honor our own word by being committed to seeing it through will be the depth of commitment we have to offer to another in relationship. It’s this understanding that will allow us to recognize the very same character values in others we choose to have relationships with.

‘Help your brother’s boat across, and Lo! your own has reached the shore.’ ~ Hindu Proverb

I am growing in my ability to recognize ones, who are in a healthy place to grow with, willing to be vulnerable and honest, who communicate with people who are just as committed as I am in honoring their Heart values by the way they live their life choices outwardly. They treat others as they would have others treat themself. This builds trust. We grow in understanding, that while our friend may not always say what we may want to hear, we trust, that they will not lie to us either. Like a plant that is temporarily ‘hurt’- shocked, by the storms, yet, understanding is what allows us to see that storms are what is necessary to straighten and strenghten the plants main stem, to allow it to continue to reach towards the sun and the stars, by making it strong enough, resilient, to continue onwards to fulfill its dream of being a bloom in the Garden of GOD.

A True Friend will hold our hand while sharing our Hearts together, as we are both reaching towards the fulfillment of our dreams.

Today, I blossom by being vulnerable and honest. I choose to be open and not contract, no longer hiding in a tight fisted bud.  I unfold into full bloom.

May this be received in the Spirit with which it is given ~

InLove ~

May this be received as healthy nourishment, that feeds our Soul’s awareness of God working in us, fostering us into a healthy and wholesome being, in order to fulfill our intended purpose in this life time.  To Live our Life to its fullest capacity, by becoming True to ourself and with others, to the best of our ability…with a little help from our friends.

May we become more aware in our understanding, that God already sees us fully in our bloom. patiently awaiting for us to direct our attention towards being conscious of God’s Loving Abiding Presence, committed  in keeping His promise to us, to see us fully through our process, thick and thin, no matter what to bring us to completion of the good work begun in us ~

Blooming On In the Never-Ending Light of Love’s Presence,

Grow Seed, Grow into the Fullness of Your True Nature!!!

InJoy this day My Friend, growing in deeper understanding, that a True Friend Loves You at all times,

Your True Friend InLove,

Julia

Copyright © 2008 - 2011 You-Nique-By-Design.com

Photo by Anurag Chivilkar, Image by imagehosting.com

‘We are the products of editing, rather than authorship.’  ~ George Wald

 ’In a world of comparison and conformity, make your own statement. Honor your own truth.
Have the courage to be yourself; risk speaking your own thoughts and claiming your emotions.
Share your vulnerabilities, tears, doubts, and insecurities; let others experience the real you.
Have the courage to be yourself and realize that you are a wonderful person.’

~ Unknown

Who’s Been Writing In My Book?

So true! How many of us live or have experienced living from a sense of not being who we really are…and in moments of clarity, when the question arises, ‘Who Am I?’  We quickly reply to our self or another, ‘I don’t know.’ And leave it there. Not being willing to take some time out for self-examination to see what is in our bag, that belongs to someone
else.

It’s like keeping permanently ‘borrowed’ ideas of an other’s view of us, as our own, and claiming ownership. The only thing about doing this, is that it tends to keep us in a state of flux, of not feeling the ground underneath the Souls of our feet as we move through this life…and so, we find ways of existing and surviving yet, not ever really experiencing a valid sense of being fully in our skins. We don’t seem to be fitting into our shoes very well or able to fill our space. It seems over crowded with a sense of there being very little room for us in our own home.

You really do know who you are. Yes, you do. It’s just a matter of doing some self examination. And your understanding will grow wider and more expansive, the more you look in the right place to find your answer. And the answer won’t be coming from another outside of yourself. In fact, this is how most of us came to be where we are in the first place,
of not knowing who we really are. We have been living our life based upon how another or others view us and expect us to be. We accept an other’s opinion as our own. And this is what causes us to experience confusion, restlessness and all range of emotions from being apathetic, angry, melancholy and even hostile. It’s from feeling out of sorts…and it is our emotions, that colors our view of life as a whole and also colors the way we act out in our behavior, influencing the choices and decisions we make in our life.

Perceiving Our Perspective

To stand still, and examine myself as the Author of my life story, being added to the pages in the Book of Eternal Life, and by Inviting The Author of All Life Stories, into the re-editing of my life from a Greater View, to allow IT to participate in this self examination by Being Present with it, has allowed me to move through this process in a more trusting way. By tapping into this Greater Perspective’s ‘cliff notes’, ITs perspective is enlarging to mine,  allowing me to enlarge my perception of life as a whole.

‘The man who views the world at fifty the same as he did at twenty has wasted thirty years of his life.’

  ~ Muhammad Ali

Wisdom shared from ‘The Butterfly’ known as Muhammad Ali. If my view of my world today, is exactly from having the same perspective I perceived life to be, 30 or more years ago, this reveals that I am stuck somewhere in my past and am not currently living from a beginner’s mind, and it is through applying self examination that will reveal that I am possibly living my life from a reactive mind to a past event, and not from living in the Present Moment of newness.

Present moment awareness, experiences everything in life as new, from the idea of not ever having had any experience of something yet…a clean palette ~

Living from a reactive mind is basing what is happening right now, from an unfinished past experience being brought forward, and living from still being buried emotionally alive in this past experience. Living in the past, has a way of coloring the palette of the way I see life in perspective right now. This is not living from the idea of, ‘Live today, as though it is the very first day of the rest of my life’, idea.

My perspective perceptions, have changed quite dramatically from having gone through the self examination process, many times throughout my life in cycles. It usually becomes apparent that a self examination is in order, to find out where the edited version of my authentic Life story is, when something or someone, has caused me to behave in a way that leaves me uncomfortable, or feeling unlike myself, as I know myself to really be. Have you ever asked yourself,  ‘why did I just say that?!? Why did I just do that!’ ‘Where did that come from?!?’ Moments experienced by all of us at some time and place in our lives.

We are going through another one of our ‘why’ stages, again…and we thought this was only a one time occurrence, a part of being two, once upon a time ago in our life! We return to being in ’stage’ two, many times, throughout each life cycle that is moving us beyond, and deeper into our expanding awareness, in the revelation of ourselves…so we will be able live our life from a larger place, a greater perspective, as our view of our self shifts from our current limited view of seeing through our perceived limitations, to living fully into the story we sense and desire and know, whether consciously or unconsciously, to be our Life story.

The rightful Author must be able to write and live its own story, and not by living from the edited version, under their ‘assumed name’, of a story as told by others.

By taking a time out, and viewing where I am now, from where I was yet to be, and seeing where I was moving from, the changes I notice have come subtly especially when coming through the experiencing of some very imposing circumstances and people, who showed up in my life as my ‘teachers’. Their purpose being to awaken me to move forward into
a more expanded way of living life more largely. And usually these changes came from learning through the experience of  suffering through the relationship or circumstance or loss of something until I let go.

Moving through each cycle has opened my mind, my heart, and my hands more and more, as I learned to let go of what I was keeping myself attached to, and was continuing to carry within me since my most impressionable years, and I did not realize this until I received the lesson through a shift in the way I saw the lesson. Moving my suffering into Joy of being freed from the attachment that was becoming harder and heavier to carry as I had continued to add to it through the years. Growing into a stubborn and resistant beast of burden.

Suffering is a tool to learn the technique in becoming practiced in the Art of Letting Go. And Self examination is the tool used when experiencing suffering in some area of our life, to be able to let go. We keep what is ours and give back what belongs to another. Ownership of ourself and our life choices.

‘No one remains quite what he was when he recognizes himself.’ 

~ Thomas Mann

Recognizing and Removing What Blocks Our Wholeness

This is what self examination does. It reveals where we are stuck by emotionally formed cords of attachment-something is holding us back from being authentic, or by attaching our self to a falsely held belief in identifying our self with being something or someone other than our self. Formed attachment is what keeps us from moving forward with being our self fully intact. Self examination can give us revelations, by allowing us to recognize who we really are underneath our masks and guises, our assumed names. We begin to understand who is who.

Getting to know the Real Being moving with the body and impersonator on the surface.
Examining my ideas and where they originally came from,  can reveal how big or small my perspective is, as in whether I view myself as being lived by life itself, relaxing into surrender of the process, being in the flow, or resistant, swimming against the current’s flow. I can tell by seeing if I am struggling and resisting the way I am living life from my current view.

Something to consider, and there is no right or wrong answer, it just reveals what we are perceiving our current life perspective from,

Does a fish swim, or does the water swim the fish? Does a bird fly, or does the air fly the bird?

Is there enough for all or there is a limited amount of resources and not enough to go around ~ our response reveals whether we view life from an abundant unlimited nature, or a limited lacking nature of not enough. In other words, it reveals how big our idea of a GOD is, or perhaps whether or not there is even a GOD here, for us to relate with.

“Don’t believe everything you think.” ~ Anon

Ignorance can be defined as a ‘lack’ of knowledge and understanding. Also known as a lack of awareness.
A lack of awareness from knowing there is more, that there is something Greater than what we may currently ‘think’ we know right now.

Self examination leads into gaining deeper InSights about ourselves, and with Wisdom, it becomes a source of adventure that leads us into finding the storehouse of our most precious treasure. Our Authentic Self.
Wisdom without understanding though, leads us into revulsion, turning away and running to find something to distract us from what we intially see and fear. Face the fear, stare it straight in the eye, and it will go.

And you will know you did it. You will know when you have faced the seeming scary monster and brought it down, and now, it has no reason to exist any longer. The monster transforms into an Angelic Being. It’s purpose was for you to see how much more you really are, than what you once believed. And this belief has been replaced by a intimate knowing, not an emotionally based belief of yours borrowed from another. For now, no one can change your perception of what you just experienced for yourself. You know you are no longer limited by that fear. It’s gone, and in it’s place is your confidence and power. You have grown wiser through greater understanding.

Understanding and Removing Our Ingrained Roles and Established Patterns

Years ago, when my daughter Sommer, was about seven years of age, she being in a cheerful mood came into the kitchen and asked me something as she sat down to eat before I drove her and her younger sister to school.
My mood matched the cloudy overcast day consumed with all the responsibilities I had to bear alone as my girl’s dad, was out of town, and I over reacted to her simple question, by snapping at her, as I left the room to go look in on her sister. When I came back, I felt terrible at how I had spoken to my daughter, realizing that she was only seven, and wondering why I had been so short, and then, I had a brief thought pop up about how my mother had spoken to me this way with regularity, as a child. This happened with my daughter, at a time in my life of  experiencing a cycle of deep change going on inside of me, and being fairly new to awareness, I was not handling it very well… I went up to my daughter, and put my arms around her and apologized for the way I had just spoken to her and I said, ‘Sommer, I’m really sorry for the way I just spoke to you, I was wrong.’ And what happened next, shocked me to the core, and sent me into a self examination process.

She burst into tears, and when she could get the words out, she cried out loud, ‘NO MOM! Don’t say sorry! You are never wrong!’ And she was being sincere! I was jolted, ‘WHAT?!? Where did she get this idea?’ And I began to see where I may have unknowingly given this impression to my daughter, through the self examination of where the way I expressed to her, or the way I behaved towards her, was really coming from. This experience awakened me to my knowing. And in my self examination process, the little thought that popped up that morning about my relationship with my mother as I had perceived at this time, was a key to understanding myself. It awakened me to being conscious of how I was living on auto pilot, without awareness of how my behavior was affecting those around me. I had to return to the root of my ingrained knee jerking behavior, by following the breadcrumb trail of where I had been wounded. I had to allow them to be experienced fully (in all of my senses), by allowing my emotions that were trapped inside by the dis-allowance of being able to openly and honestly express my hurtful emotions at this time in my life, in certain incidents, they were crying out to be released. They had managed to get stuck, pushed under and silenced, and not just in my memory, but in my body and my cells. Our emotions have a way of getting deeply entrenched into our body, minds and souls. And I was living life from this view, unknowingly in the moment,  in the way I related to my life through my relationships with others. And the circumstances that would arise in my life from carrying this view inside in ignorance, perceptual blindness would reflect this fact.

Honesty With Ourself Leads To Geting Free of Non-Productive Patterns

I had been living from a negative view of life being untrustworthy and hard, and uncaring about me, and that I did not really matter in the scheme of things. At this time, I could not have said this, because I was unaware that I was doing this, and I had yet to find the words to express what was in my Heart still to be forgiven. Forgiving as in letting go of the offenses that blocked my view of seeing Love being there with me and understanding me and why I was the way I was.

How often had I over reacted to something someone said, or a circumstance that popped up, from this place? From a reactive mind living in this present moment from a past life experience. We cannot really be fully present in this moment, if we were not allowed to be fully present in a past experience. This will naturally follow into the present moment living and continue to affect it. These things leave mountains in our paths, and Love is what melts and softens those mountains down to mere bumps in the road of our Journey.

Self examination is primarily soul work, and it affects all parts of our being when recognized as such. I became more conscious of how I was responding to my daughter, and focused on practicing more self control. I became more watchful of my emotions, to make sure I was not coming from a reactive mind, repeating an ingrained response, once learned from my past experience, yet to be forgiven if I were still bringing it forward. As I grew more trusting in my intuitions to follow the breadcrumb trail or for some the blood trail, to the place of the original wound, the process became easier to move through because I was becoming quite skilled at using a shovel, a dusting brush and cleansing the artifacts I found with a good dose of the water of my tears.

You may have an initial fear of doing this work, like I once did, believing in fear, that you won’t be able to stand the pain of re-visiting the experience. I am here to InCourage and InPower you, that you are far more powerful and courageous than you may currently believe about yourself. And going through these self examination processes, will reveal that what you know inside can be trusted and your what your Heart knows, is more powerful than what your mind may believe, and listening to your Heart, ironically, will turn your beliefs around from being an emotionally based one, to a knowledge based belief due to following your Heart Home.

Emotional beliefs are like passing acquaintances, shakeable and loose, and always shifting around, and Heart Knowledge is intimate in its unshakableness, anchored in solid ground. Moving from living as our feelings being in control of us, to us living from an inner strength that recognizes itself as the emoter of its emotions.

‘Nothing real can be threatened. Nothing unreal exists.
Herein lies the peace of God. ‘

~ A Course In Miracles

When we are willing-open to Inviting and receiving, a Greater Understanding~ a larger Perspective view of life into our self imposed limits of understanding, our perception shifts into living our life from the foundational ground of experiencing peace as a constant companion, we become intimately acquainted with a Presence, anchoring us in our life more and more, and this InSight can be clearly sensed when meeting with another person along life’s way. This gained InSight into ourself, comes from recognizing having once lived from this emotionally controlled view as well. This is not a judgment, this is discernment, having the ability to know the difference.

Discernment comes about from having a change of perspective, which then, enlarges our perception. We recognize a previously experienced sense of ourself in another, to see if our emotions are in check, in their rightful place, in order for us to be able to see how much we have changed and progressed!! The way you once were, is being presented to you to see if you have indeed had a change of perspective and what you have gained from this shift. Discernment comes through reviewing our choices we’ve made this far…

When we are able to meet our self in another, and not get emotionally drawn in like we once did, we know that we know what we know. And that is all that matters. We don’t question ourselves about something any longer.

‘Know thyself, or at least keep renewing the acquaintance.’  ~ Robert Brault

Self examination is not a one time only, useful tool to be tossed out after just one use. It is a life long useful tool. Self examination is a keeper of a tool to have handy.

‘God hides things by putting them all around us.’  ~Author Unknown

Letting Go To Grow Into the UnShakeable Ground of Understanding

There’s a place you may find your self in, where your perspective is being radically altered, especially when your usual experience of your established world turns into a similar version of ‘The Sky Is Falling’ story tale…

‘Everyone therefore who hears these words of mine, and does them, I will liken him to a wise man, who built his house on a rock (of unshakeable anchored knowledge). The rain came down, the floods came, and the winds blew, and beat on that house; and it didn’t fall, for it was founded on the rock. Everyone who hears these words of mine, and doesn’t do them will be like a foolish man, who built his house on the sand (insecure emotional based beliefs). The rain came down, the floods came, and the winds blew, and beat on that house; and it fell—and great was its fall.’

~Jesus,  Matthew 7:24–27

Examining oneself is a tool to sharpen one’s InSight into what isn’t holding up your world in existence any longer. Something is amiss and not working out…as in false knowledge, false beliefs, false foundations. And once the dust settles after the storm that blew our house down has passed through, you can see more clearly into what you previously thought had been holding your world all together, once what wasn’t holding it up, falls away… leaving you alone for a moment to face the realization of your Truth. Where you subconsciously may have been placing your trust fully into, and what remains and does not disappear speaks for ItSelf.

I’ve noticed that the more trusting I have become of life, the more Accepting I have become of life no matter what changes have happened in my relationships with people, places, and things, that are continuously moving through it…they transform in appearance into another person, another circumstance, place and another thing…~

Wisdom is given to be able to use its InSight on how to do miracles and Understanding is what heals what is keeping us from living authentically as The Author of our life story. A miracle in this sense is having a change of mind.

Re-editing our edited story, in my idea, is examining what is making us ‘tick’ or sick, and by recognition, removing the shaky loose bricks that once formed our world as we knew it to be, creating room to be able to create new things, by choosing to build our house upon solidly grounded rock.  Exchanging a false pearl one for the Real one of value…

Unshakeable stone, which is for me, is a Knowledge that comes through an unfolding relationship with The Living Intelligence of All Life, that holds this entire Universe together… Beliefs to me, that are based on emotions only, are the shifting sands on which I may be building my life upon…and I come to understand that my beliefs are always shifting, and changing…just like my emotions.

Knowledge comes from remaining sure in ourself, no matter what another does or says or believes, we are able to remain unshaken by allowing our emotions to be what they are, just passing through. Knowledge comes from the foundation of knowing ourself intimately, and no one nor no thing, can take away this knowing, when we are deeply grounded, anchored in our authentic Being’s underground Source of Life. We are living our life from the solid ground of All Being, no matter what may be shifting in our outer world…opinions, emotions, relationships, circumstances. Our world is not rocked by whatever is happening on the outside.

The things that have changed and shifted my perception is my perceived identity, as was once based upon others view (the edited version of myself), removing the edits one by one, has meant having to walk through the experiencing of the seeming ‘loss’ of all the physical, material things I once identified as being a part of what once made me suppose to be me, and made up my former story, according to others. I was willing to exchange my story as told by others through me.  And through the process of editing bit by bit, in each time out of being taken to the side, moved into position of taking the time for another look at this story of my life, I shifted from seeing only others view of my story into seeing it from my own and owning my authorship.

Opening my once closed eyes to see that I was being guided by The Loving Author of All Life, also known to some, as The Author and Finisher of our Faith. This experience has given me a deep and abiding Trust that nothing can separate anyone from this  Infinite Love, except a limited perspective built upon a limited perception, caused by living from other’s edited version of who we are, a lack of knowing who we were created to be.

We can trade in our ignorance-our lack of awareness, for a Greater Awareness. And this takes Self Examination. To see what and where our perceived barriers may be hiding the real being, from deep inside of us, preventing us from experiencing our Life from an abundant natured view of being enough. Otherwise, we are living from a sense of  self acceptance without self awareness, from this lack of being aware perspective.

Self examination will change your mind about this.

You will experience a miracle in your life ~

Self examination when applied with Wisdom and Understanding, places the power back where it belongs. In us, to live our lives in the fullness of our Being. It’s just a matter of perspective…

Look At Your Life Map, Where Are You In Your Authenticity? Where Do You Desire to Be?

Where are you right now in your story? Are you experiencing your life theme as though being in the heat of a race, a battle, a struggle for your ‘life’? Perhaps you may not realize yet, that the only one we ever really are running away from is our self, the self we don’t want to be, or like being, because it is coming from a false source of information. Like Jim Carey’s character Truman, who tears the movie screen and realizes he has been living a false life based on being written by a someone Else’s story version of you. Are you willing to Stop the movie you are playing in right now? Are you willing to take a breather, and just Be still, to do some self examination of your thoughts and find the source of them? It may take disappearing from the screen for awhile. To allow your self to really listen with your heart and mind together in one place.

Do you see yourself as being important enough, to make some time for yourself, to stand still long enough, and hear what the response is inside of you? So you can say I know, and lose the ingrained ’I don’t know?’

Choose To Begin

The more you practice the technique of Self examination, you will know that it happens in a very safe place, where there is no judge nor jury in this ’secret place’ waiting to sentence the authentic you to a death, just the assumed one.

Self examination reveals how our emotions do play a vital role in determining the tone of how we view our lives…

And that my friends is a story left for another day ~

For now, InJoy playing with the idea that your real life story is unfolding as the Authentic YOU, underneath the assumed name you might be ‘believing’ is you right now. The You, already completed yet, still in the reading, as a Living Book, unfolding in Its awareness, line by line, page by page…in your revised editing process of Self Examination with
Your Life Author.

As you read through your story, may you be able to really relate with yourself as Being the main character in your story, rightfully being Authored by you co-written with the Author of All Life Stories ~

It is you, and always has been about you, writing your own story. Stop living from being an edited version of your self.

The Story through your Self Examination process, will lead you to the revelation, that you are You-nique-By Design, as established by The Author of All Love’s Stories Ever Written…

You just have to make the time to write it for yourself, and read it for yourself…to appreciate your own story written into the Living Book of Eternal Love Stories or leave it unwritten and unknown ~

Many Blessings, on expressing your authentic self, the Main Character in your Never-Ending Love Story, that is you, relating to all others, in an unfolding intriguing, romantic, mysterious, adventure, being expressed in A Love Story for All Times, from experiencing a Love Relationship with an Endless, Timeless, Presence ~

Be Blessed, Be Well ~

InJoy this day ~ Be InPowered to do some Self Examination ~ emptying out your inner contents and seeing What’s in your bag? Discerning for yourself whether or not you are living your life being grounded from…
Emotionally Charged Beliefs or anchored in Established and secured Knowledge?

To your unfolding certainty in Knowing, as grow in your Understanding that you are Forever InLove’s Keeping,

Many Blessings INLOVE, from The Author of this story ~

Julia

Copyright © 2008 - 2011 You-Nique-By-Design.com

Image from Public Domain

~Alfred North Whitehead

‘Free improvisation, in addition to being a highly skilled musical craft, is open to use by almost anyone–beginners, children, and non-musicians.
The skill and intellect required is whatever is available.
Its accessibility to the performer is, in fact, something which appears to offend both its supporters and detractors….
And as regards method, the improvisor employs the oldest in music-making…
Mankind’s first musical performance couldn’t have been anything other than a free improvisation.’

~Derek Bailey

‘If music be the food of love, play on: give me excess of it…’

~William Shakespeare

 Yes, Jonathan, play on ~

InJoy this day Being InSpired in watching this You-nique By Design wonder…

Many Blessings,

To your Well-Being ~

Julia

‘If you watch how nature deals with adversity, continually renewing itself, you can’t help but learn.’

 ~ Bernie Siegel

‘Look deep, deep into nature, and then you will understand everything better.’

~ Albert Einstein

‘Nature does nothing uselessly.’

~ Aristotle

A loving thank you to my Soul Sister and friend, Kathie, for sharing this amazing email with me, regarding the rebirth process of eagles and how it relates to change being about making a choice. We can be so InSpired about the natural process of life as we observe Nature’s ways. We have the freewill and freedom to change our life.

If you happen to be experiencing some radical changes in your life, and everything seems to be appearing as out of sorts or off kilter in your external world right now, be InCouraged in viewing ‘The Rebirth of Eagles’.

May your heart, mind and eyes be opened to the possibility that what you are experiencing right now is change.  Change is life in motion, and it is only a temporary experience, yet, a very natural part of the process of life. These experiences of change, are life’s way of presenting us with an opportunity to choose to change in ways that will enlarge us, by letting go of our past experiences up to now,  creating room for rebirthing, and allowing space for new experiences, that will gift us with a renewed, greater sense of ourself, in order to fly higher than we have ever imagined flying before. Growing our new wings to be able to see vista’s yet to be discovered. Change is a gift being unwrapped in the process…

InJoy this day,

Being InSpired in your Journey ~

May you live being Present today, with a renewed sense of understanding, in accepting life’s cycles, and in the deeper inner knowing, that everything under the Sun has its purpose, even when we are not fully aware of the beneficial nature of our progression all the way through, just yet ~

Be patient with yourself, while experiencing life’s process of continual changes in motion…leading you to greater heights, and unfolding within you, a greater purpose for your life through each phase of metamorphosis ~

Be Blessed, Be Well InLove,

Julia

The ReBirth of Eagles

Copyright © 2011 You-Nique-By-Design.com